I never did find out if my doctor met the requirement and faxed the information into the pre-admissions office at the hospital. I surely hope so.
I called and left a message for the hospital but they haven't called me back. Surely my doctor's slow faxing skills cannot get in the way of my surgery, right? RIGHT?
It's strange. After all this time and all this planning, your mind starts to play tricks with you. Maybe it is the lack of carbs but I have fairly well convinced myself that something is going to cause this surgery to be postponed. Maybe I simply won't believe it until I wake up in post-op. Maybe I never will believe it.
And lately the question running through my mind is "What if this never happens?" What if it all blows up in my face. The one thing I have learned through this pre-op diet is that I CANNOT do this alone. The hunger is like a monkey on my back. It never lessens. It never goes away.
And, though I don't want to die young, I can't live with this either.
Please let this surgery happen. I need this so much.
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